Thompson Proposes Iraq Invasion

Ann Arbor, MI – At a Republican Presidential Debate Tuesday, candidate Fred Thompson introduced a bill (SR 789) to invade Iraq and dethrone Saddam Hussein. “You’re no longer a member of Congress so you can’t introduce a bill,” Senator John McCain grumbled. Thompson, who recently suggested that the Soviet Union, which no longer exists, poses the greatest threat to our national security, also could not recall the specifics of the Terry Schiavo case. “Was she the one who starred with Michael Keaton in Mr. Mom?” Thompson asked moderator Chris Matthews. In response to a question from Maria Bartiromo on the threat of AIDS, Thompson said that we should not assume that because Liberace has contracted the disease that it will necessarily become an epidemic. He added, “You have nice lips.”